When planning a holiday, we always hope that our trip will be as comfortable as possible and we do everything we can to avoid any incidents. But, as you’ll surely agree, life often makes adjustments to even the most carefully thought-out plans. At best, those surprises can be merely annoying. At worst, they can turn all of your expectations upside down.
There was this girl, Jane, working in our department. She was a very good employee; always keen to excel and learn something new. A couple of years ago, her grandmother died and left her a luxury villa in a prestigious neighborhood. Someone from our office told Jane that she could use her inheritance as a way to radically change her life. For example, she could rent the house out and use the money to settle down in some exotic place. Of course, this was a joke, and we soon forgot about it. Until one Monday, Jane came to work with a resignation letter in one hand and a ticket to India in the other. We all wished her the best of luck!
Whenever I end up in one of those hotel rooms where the hair dryer can’t be pulled out from its socket and the coat hooks are loose, I always think, “Do you guys honestly think I travel without a screwdriver?
Tourists are a peculiar folk. This story happened in the Ukrainian town of Mariupol. One foreign tourist decided to see if he could walk to the Russian town of Taganrog and back again in one day. As he set out on his journey, he joked to his wife that he was going to another town to buy some bread. Mariupol is about 30 miles from the Russian-Ukrainian border, and Taganrog is another 30 miles further away. When the guy reached the border, the guards asked him about his destination and the purpose of his visit. He answered, “I’m just walking to Taganrog to buy some bread!” The guards began to suspect he was crazy so he gave them his wife’s phone number. They called her and the conversation went something like this:
“Are you and your husband currently staying in Mariupol?”
“Yes, but my husband is away right now.”
“Where is he?”
“We ran out of bread, so he went to Taganrog!”
There is a theory that our universe is infinite and because of this, it might contain copies of our own planet. Just imagine it — a spaceship travels millions of light-years in search of alien worlds...only to touch down in Oklahoma
I went on a tourist trip to another country recently. I had almost no knowledge of the local language so I didn’t really feel comfortable being surrounded by crowds of people I couldn’t understand. Also, everyone seemed a bit too carefree and cheerful for my taste. There were too many people smiling everywhere. And then, amidst all these happy, smiling faces, I suddenly heard, “What the hell are you smiling at, weirdo?” in my mother tongue. It was the best moment of the entire trip!
My friend went to Brazil last year. Upon his arrival, he was immediately warned about the local crime rate. Also, he was advised not to visit the beaches at night, since there was a high risk of bumping into one of the numerous youth gangs. However, he didn’t heed the warnings. In his own words, here’s what came of it, “Right from the start, I overdid it with the sunbathing and burned my skin pretty seriously. So I decided to take my chances and go for a swim at night when there’s no sun but the water is still warm. When I got to the beach, I was immediately surrounded by a group of 10-15 youths. They didn’t waste time and immediately took my T-shirt. This didn’t stop me from returning to the beach the next night. Once again, the same thugs surrounded me but this time they didn’t take anything. On my third nighttime visit to the shore, they simply waved at me. And on my fourth, they gave me back my T-shirt. On the fifth night, we had a drink together, something that tasted like a mixture of rum and brandy. Then, on the sixth, I brought the guys some proper alcohol and a couple of 6-packs. In the end, I was driven back to the hotel in the thugs’ car, followed by an entourage of scooters and mopeds.”
My Russian friend told me this story from his trip to Cuba: “There I am, standing with the rest of my tourist group, listening to a smiling guide telling us about the pleasures of life on the island. Suddenly, the guide interrupts his lecture and says, ’We really love Russians over here. So much so, that we’ve even got a saying, ’Russian people are famous for their ability to find a way out of any kind of trouble. The only thing they’re even more famous for is their ability to find a way into every kind of trouble.’ And then he looks at us, and gives us a really big smile.”
Recently, my friend and I went on a trip to Spain. To save money, we shared a single room at our Madrid hotel. The room had a double bed that was actually 2 beds put together. Of course, we always moved our beds apart before going to sleep. However, every single morning, the hotel maid unfailingly pushed the beds back together. Not only that but she also never forgot to put a rose on one of them; on my bed, to be precise. Whatever gave her that idea?